Monday, February 6, 2012

Boys vs. Girls

I was blatantly reminded of the difference between boys and girls yesterday. Though there were a few not so surprising moments, to say there was stereotypical behavior in my home, is dead on.

Yesterday was beautiful. The sun was shining, the temperature was a balmy 40 degrees, my house was pretty much clean, and the laundry was...well, still washing. Thankfully, my boys decided to go outside to play with their friends, my girls occupied themselves by destroying their room with Polly Pocket and Barbie play, and my oldest daughter went for a bike ride and dog walking adventure. What, oh what, was a mommy with "nothing" to do, do??? I sat my ass down on the couch, turned on the TV, and started flipping channels. Knowing full well that the moment I sat down, the boys would come home hungry, the girls would abandon their naked plastic dolls, and my daughter would bombard me with an "I'm bored" ranting. As luck would have it, or mothers intuition, my little ones deserted the tsunami they created in their room, and snuggled up next to me on the couch.

I'm not a TV watcher. In fact, I only admit to watching the news in the morning (sometimes), Cupcake Wars, and Jersey Shore. Other than that, I don't bother. My children on the other hand know more about what's going on in the world than I do. When we came across the WE network of My Fair Wedding with David Tutera, my girls fell apart. Hands down, this was what we were watching! "Mommy, don't change the channel!!!!", "I want to see them kiss!", "Look at her pretty dress!", and "I always pee when they kiss at the end!"...the last one put me over the edge. All I can do at this point is shake my head. Who were these girls all of a sudden? Clearly not the ones who take on wrestling and beating up their older brother! I was now dealing with Disney fairytale dreamers all wide eyed and sighing. They were making Scarlet Ohara look like a phony at this point.

Well, I suffice to say that my oldest daughter came home and sat glued to the TV. Mind you this is the child who claimed for years that she was NEVER getting married. My boys came home, starving, watched briefly, then proceeded to leave for Wii football. Somewhere in the next six hours, I fed my kids, cleaned the kitchen, showered all of us, made my bed, plopped my boys in front of the "big" TV for the Superbowl, and positioned the three girls in my bed for MORE wedding extravaganza. By 9pm I was wedded out! After watching six hours of weddings I have learned several things.

First, every wedding I've ever been too, including my own, was extremely cheesy. Second, I have learned to NEVER say, "I've seen it all", because I have not. And third, are you kidding me???? When I tell my girlfriend that I've been watching this show, the first thing she reminds me is not to be a hater and ruin it for my girls. Whatever! I want to see these couples in ten years! Then that awful moment comes when I hear the words, "for my wedding I want..." Why, why did God bless me with THREE girls???? Why??? With an 11 year old and two 7 year olds, the competition is already heating up. How or why I did not change the channel to Vegas weddings and How To Elope, is beyond my realm of comprehension at this point. It won't be how am I going to afford college for them, but how am I going to afford an over-the-top, fairytale, dream wedding of the century, for EACH of them now?!

Stupid TV. I should have never turned it on. I should have found something else to clean in the house. I should have NEVER sat down. This is what happens when I get the crazy idea to actually sit for five minutes. Or in this case, six hours! By 9pm my youngest son was done and thankfully, the girls had had enough. Sweet dreams followed for all four of them. Only one child remained awake. My oldest son, glued to the Superbowl, hoping and praying for the Giants to make a comeback, and win the big one. Exhausted, I sat down and snuggled up with him. There was over 12 minutes left in the game, New York was down, and my son was beside himself. This was nice I thought. Just the two of us. No more wedding talk. Pure boy stuff..."mom, I just farted".... Why I get the crazy idea to sit down is incomprehensible to even myself. I can only sigh and roll my eyes... The things we endure for quality time spent with our kids. I would never want to admit it, but in the end, I was glad I sat down. I wouldn't trade yesterday for anything. You can't put a price on knowing you put all of your kids to bed with smiles on their faces and happy thoughts in their heads.