Always The Bad Guy

Honestly, the title says it all. I am the mom, I am always the bad guy. Being a single mom does NOT help the situation. Not one bit. However, there has to come a time when I have to put my foot down. Whether I'm right or not has absolutely nothing to do with the circumstance at hand. It comes down to principal, and in my children's case, prior commitments. Or lack there of.

I no sooner walked in the house last night and my oldest daughter started in on me. She DESPERATELY wanted to join the orchestra at her school. My initial reaction to her request was no. Followed by a more forceful no. Followed by a screaming and crying match. Followed by a "fine, I'll pay for it myself". Followed by an absolutely NOT. And finally, a no, because you won't stick with it.

I played an instrument, a few actually, so it's not that I have a problem with her actually playing one. My problem is this. SHE NEVER FOLLOWS THROUGH ON ANYTHING. I know we aren't supposed to say "always, never, anything, or everything" during an argument. And I try VERY VERY hard not to. However, her track record precedes her and with the rest of my kids already in VERY expensive sports, the idea of one more place to cart one more child to, or one more expense that won't pan out, puts me a tad over the edge.

I happen to catch a part of the Today show with Kathy Lee and Hoda this morning. They were interviewing Solei Moon Frye. Apparently she wrote a book called Happy Chaos. Solei went on and on about how much she loved being a mom and truly learned to embrace all the chaos of being one. Blah, blah, blah. I love being a mom too. But let's be honest. It's not all its cracked up to be some days. AND, the chaos isn't too bad when you ONLY have two toddlers. I'm not sure she realizes what's in store for her a few years down the road. God bless her if she still feels this way in 10 years.

I can embrace chaos too. However, at some point you have to keep a lid on it AND be the bad guy. I can be my kids friend all day long and play and make a mess just as well as any two year old. However, at the end of the day, I'm the mom, I'm the boss, and what I say goes. I've had to admit I was sorry or wrong a few times in the past 11 years. But all in all, I'd like to think that my kids respect the fact that it is only me and that they may not get EVERYTHING they want, they get more than what they NEED. Compared to most third world countries? it's a hell of a lot.